Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they
will not leave it. Proverbs 22:6
We all know
people who grew up in church, and have now
departed, want nothing to do with church.
This verse does not constitute some magical formula, like a magic wand
you can wave to make sure your children don’t act like heathens. The founder of Methodism, John Wesley,
understood that:
We must not
imagine that these words are to be understood in an absolute sense, as if no
child that had been trained up in the way wherein he should go had ever
departed form it….The words, then, must be understood with some limitation, and
then they contain an unquestionable truth. It is a general, though not a
universal, promise.
Even modern-day
sociologists and psychologists verify this, that we are largely products of our
environmental and sociological influences – the way we are raised, and those
influences to which we are subjected.
The verse
Solomon wrote does not mean to say exposing children to the right path
guarantees they’ll never get off it.
Rather it alerts us to the strength of that path, and how the teaching
will never leave the children. It will
call to them, call them back to the path
all their lives.
That is the
power of example…which is about 150% of parenting.
After church and the baptism of his baby
brother, the four-year-old little guy cried all the way home. His father asked him three times, Johnny, what’s wrong? Finally Johnny
replied, when that man bapatized
Christopher he told you an' Mom God wanted him an’ me raised in a Christian
home; but I wanna stay with you guys.
So…what is the right path?
Scripture does not leave us
wanting. Solomon also wrote about that
path of living well and right, understanding life’s choices:
These are the wise sayings of Solomon,
David’s son, Israel’s king— Written down so we’ll know how to
live well and right, to understand what life means and where it’s going; A manual for living, for learning what’s right and just and fair; To teach the inexperienced the ropes and give our young people a
grasp on reality. There’s
something here also for seasoned men and women, still a thing or
two for the experienced to learn— Fresh wisdom to probe and penetrate, the
rhymes and reasons of wise men and women. Start with God—the first step in learning
is bowing down to God; only fools thumb their noses at such wisdom and
learning. Pay close
attention, friend, to what your father tells you; never forget what you learned
at your mother’s knee. Proverbs 1:1 - 8 (TMSG)
A house is built by wisdom and
becomes strong through good sense.
Through knowledge its rooms are filled with all sorts of precious
riches and valuables. The wise are
mightier than the strong, and those with knowledge grow stronger and
stronger. So don’t go to war without
wise guidance; victory depends on having many advisers. Proverbs 24:3 - 6
The picture shows the four focus
areas. Of these, please note Scripture
is on top, meaning it is more heavily weighted than the others. Really, in Wesley’s thought, Scripture governed
the others. That is to say, the other
three could not be considered over Scripture, and any tradition, experience, or
human reasoning must square with Scripture in order to be valid for the
Christian home. God’s Word is our main
guide.
When it comes to building a home with
wisdom, there is nothing which truly expresses family values
than the Scriptures, reinforced by loving parents, who exhibit in their living,
reason, the tradition of the church and knowledge, formed by experiential
learning of Christ’s way.
This morning I want to talk about how
living out these principles is the key to establishing, strengthening, growing
a family, and, during times of crisis, gathering and reuniting the herd of
God’s sheep, rather than scatter them.
Along the way we will also see how to acquire
and activate
what Solomon calls “wisdom, good sense and knowledge”.
I. Wisdom (reason)
Acquired by reverence for God
For the reverence and
fear of God are basic to all wisdom. Proverbs 9:10a (TLB)
True wisdom is not merely the accumulation
of a great deal of information, or even knowing where it’s stored. Anyone with an iPhone™ and an internet
connection has more information at his fingertips than he could possibly read
in a thousand lifetimes.
True wisdom is discernment, the ability to
judge between right and wrong, good, and best.
It is, in part, being able to sense the will and heart of God. Without this kind of wisdom we can miss the
mark so often. Truly
worshiping God brings you close enough to hear his heartbeat; you know when God
is speaking.
Activated by a life of prayer
If any of you is lacking in wisdom, ask
God, who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly, and it will be given
you. James 1:5 (NRSV)
There is no PhD required to be a person of
wisdom. I’ve known some people who had a
lifetime pursuit of education but had little (if any) Godly discernment. Opposite of that, I can give you quite a list
of folks who hardly made it through elementary grades, yet other people beat a
pathway to their door for advice when they were facing tough decisions in their
lives.
No matter what your formal
education level, ask God for wisdom and show Him you’re serious by reverencing
Him in worship, establishing a lifestyle of prayer. You will find that discernment becomes that
internal growing sense of confidence in God’s ways.
II. Good sense (tradition)
The tradition of the church (as Wesley
called it) is that counsel of wisdom developed over the last 20 centuries. Good sense in the
original language gives a word picture of the strong steering ropes attached to
the rudder of a large ship[1].
With those ropes (tradition) the helmsman (God) brings the ship safely
to port.
But good sense finds itself constantly
engaged in a battle with foolishness.
That is something with which we struggle because of our inherited human nature,
which includes both a proclivity toward good and a carnal appetite for evil.
In every generation foolishness says the
church is out of date, too constricting or judgmental. But the tradition of the church is that
hard-earned wisdom from suffering centuries of immature folly – when Christian
saints fall-away from God’s Word and way, only to experience the heartache of
the consequences of sin.
Tradition became the developed memory of
believers who saw how departing from God’s way is dangerous and
keeping God’s way is profitable. How do
you get “good sense”?
Acquired by counsel of the body of Christ
Pay close attention, friend, to what your
father tells you; never forget what you learned at your mother’s knee. Proverbs
1: 8 (TMSG)
Father and mother refer to more than our
biological parents; it includes those who are father and mother in the
faith…and brothers and sisters.
The body of Christ – the church, this church and the worldwide Christian
church take counsel together to understand the mind of Christ. This is the good sense
that is wise counsel.
Activated by submission in the body of Christ
This kind of “good sense” is available to
those who, in faith, take a step of confidence towards the body. In short, becoming a full part of God’s
church – membership, declaring your allegiance and support-for/continued prayers,
presence, gifts, service, and witness; this is how you initiate the wise
counsel of God’s church in your life.
Several years ago Carrie posted on
Facebook a picture of her sons delivering flowers to residents at the nursing
home. Shannon is a deacon-servant in
their church; he and Carrie are committed to visiting those in distress and
sharing God’s Word. He is training his
sons to do these things too. They
understand they do this because Jesus gave to us this ministry of care for each
other. That is the tradition of the
church. My son in law is bringing wise
counsel to the table to build his house with wisdom!
III. Knowledge (experience)
Godly knowledge is what fills the house
with what’s worthwhile. In the Wesleyan
sense, experiential faith is that which God teaches you as you live your life
for (and with) Him. It is also called The
Surrendered Life.
The Apostle Paul wrote:
That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the
fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death; Philippians 3:10(KJV)
To know him…this is the essence of knowledge, or knowing God, through fellowship
with Christ. This is what fills your
life and household with precious treasure…knowing Jesus Christ!
Acquired by investment in relationships
True experiential knowledge of Christ is
found in a daily conversation with Him, and others. When asked about the greatest (most
important) of the commandments, Jesus said it was to love God with everything
you’ve got…and the second was to love others.
Think of it as the vertical (up towards God) and horizontal (outward
towards people) of knowledge – loving God, loving neighbors.
Genuine, precious treasure is never
measured by your performance on a job, or how much money you have in the
bank. Rather it is that daily
conversation, or interaction (with God and man) that makes investment in other
lives.
Knowing God results in every other kind of understanding. Proverbs 9:10b(TLB)
Activated by accepting Christ as lord of
life
Knowing Christ is something that happens
in your spirit…deep in your spirit.
And it is begun by choosing to follow Christ as a disciple. It goes beyond merely knowing “about” Christ, or just accepting
the fact that He is God’s son who was born in a manger…all those facts are
easily “knowable”, information-wise.
To genuinely know (experience) Jesus
Christ as Savior is to choose Him as Lord over life…your life! It means you choose to follow
Him every day of your life, on His terms.
It means to surrender your free will to
God’s sovereign will. A wise leader in
the home will teach that to the children in the home by letting them see it
lived-out by the parents in that home.
A time for choice
Solomon was the wisest
man of his time. He experienced
virtually everything that was available, everything under the sun. He
understood Scripture. He could discern
people and even divide a child between two arguing women. In the end, he decided there were only two
important things to which we need to pay attention:
Here is my final conclusion: fear God and
obey his commandments, for this is the entire duty of man. Ecclesiastes
12:13 (TLB)
How do you fear God? Believe what the Scripture says about Jesus
being your salvation.
How do you obey his commands? Ask Him for wisdom, follow the wise counsel
of the body of Christ and immerse yourself in a daily conversation (prayer
life) with Christ and others, so that you can know Him.
And if you’ll build your own life with
this kind of wisdom, those children, and grandchildren of yours will get it;
they see much more than you could ever say with words!
·
You’ll build your home with wisdom!
·
You’ll gather the herd that tends to
scatter!
Father, you have
called us to be people who unite for the purpose of uniting all humans in Your
Kingdom. Sometimes we get discouraged
because we think every bit of that is up to us.
But You have called us to be responsible right where we’re planted.
Help us, Lord, with
the person we know best – ourselves – to let Scripture inform our reason, our
traditions, and our experiential knowledge of You. In order that the wisdom You give will inform
and inspire those who meet us to see Jesus as the light in our souls…and give
all glory, honor, and praise to You.
We pray in the Name
of the Father, Because of the Son, Cooperating with the Spirit. Let it be so in each of our lives…Amen!
