Wednesday, September 9, 2026
The apostle Paul cried out in his grieving anguish over his inescapable
sins:
For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: But I
see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing
me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! who shall
deliver me from the body of this death?
Romans 7:22-24
Certainly, grieving is a new normal when you’ve lost someone dear to
you. But, what use is grief, if all it does
is make you aware your entire future is surrounded by depths certain to
overwhelm and swallow you?
I love pleasant new beginnings with (at least) a vague idea of what I
will choose and perhaps encounter…a refreshing revelation or amusement. But grief…this maw of a black hole bids me “come
and be devoured”. At times, it is almost
preferred; after all, the pain I can see, and to which I might surrender in the
blink of an eye, promises a blissful nothingness in an instant; is it not
better, that we may escape a drowning, sorrowful, unending struggle and succumb
nonetheless at the end?
So, is it not a tempting call to my aching, spent soul, weary of
paddling aimlessly against grief’s unknown?
Let it Be, Paul, let it BE!
Now, if you’re from the early 60’s you immediately heard the lyrics
from Lennon, McCartney, Harrison, and Starr (better known as The Beattles). The song, “Let It Be” was written by Paul
McCartney after his mother (Mary) died.
He had a comforting dream that she (not Mary, mother of Jesus) came to
him, and Paul McCartney was inspired to write these words:
When
I find myself in times of trouble,
Mother
Mary comes to me, Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And
in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me,
Speaking
words of wisdom, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.
And
when the broken hearted people living in the world agree
There
will be an answer, let it be. Let it be.
For
though they may be parted,
there
is still a chance that they will see.
There
will be an answer, let it be. Let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.[1]
As Paul McCartney wrote those words to deal with his loss, and the
accompanying pain of grief, I must also give voice to what is my hour of
darkness. (Unlike McCartney, I haven’t
made a dime on my singing ability!)
“Words of wisdom” applied to a rock band of dubious character
notwithstanding, I rather defer to older, more tested Godly wisdom, King David.
Who grieved over the losses he suffered, his dearest friend, Jonathan, Absalom,
his loved Son, killed in the uprising he started against his father, and an
unnamed infant son dying as a result of David’s sin with Bathsheba.
Be gracious to me, Lord, for I am weak; heal me, Lord, for my
bones are shaking; my whole being is shaken with terror. And you, Lord—how long? Turn, Lord! Rescue me; save me because of your faithful
love. For there is no
remembrance of you in death; who can thank you in Sheol? I am weary from my groaning; with my
tears I dampen my bed and drench my couch every night. Psalm 6:2-6
David’s whole life was coming unglued, and he knew it was his
fault. Yet, he counted on the Lord’s
forgiveness in the worst grief one could imagine. When you have struggled in
the rip tide of grief and look back to see what gain you
have made, you discover the tide has carried you farther away from the safe
shore which was your desired outcome.
All that was familiar and treasured lies back on the sandy shoreline,
under the strong umbrella of the past, with its known pains and joys; this
unknown agony is a beast to be avoided, no matter the cost!
And yet, we grieve. Why do we do it? Because we have loved.
And the deeper the love with which we have given ourselves, the more
intense the pain we will go through. It
is like the sides of an equation; the sums must be equal. As one plus one will always total two, the
heights of love will always be a mirror for the depths of our loss.
To come back to Mr. McCartney, that “let it be” comes in here. Most of us, going through this journey we call
grieving, are looking for the exit door.
Some find it in distractions, drugs, or detaching altogether. Distractions, however glitzy (and costly) don’t
negate grief, only our attention. Drugs merely
anesthetize us to the pain, and the ultimate costs speak for themselves; we
alienate ourselves from relationships, lose a job, and often self-respect,
along with any semblance of health.
Detachment is probably the most common, a view of life as tasteless, and
simply opting to let the fields grow wild.
There are probably many more paths that people choose, but I only write
of the ones I’ve known and have chosen to reject the past 21 months. I have instead turned to the advice of King David,
trusting in the Lord’s forgiving, healing hand, and Apostle Paul, who, after
screaming his “death wish” cry for deliverance…who will deliver me from
the body of this death, responded this way: I thank God through Jesus Christ our
Lord. (Romans 7:25)
The truth is we all grieve if we have loved at
all. Imagine how God grieves with us
considering the depth of His love for us.
You
chew on that as you hit the Rocky Road; have a blessed day!
[1] Title
and Other Images: Dimitris Vetsikas from Pixabay
Unless noted, Scripture from Christian
Standard Bible©
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